Lately Anna has been messing with me when it comes to sleep. Earlier this week she actually let me sleep for five hours. Twice. Turns out that was just so the rest of the week would suck more when she suddenly decided she wanted to be wide awake until 3am, and go back to a 3 hour feeding schedule at night. Right now (at 2am) I have been trying to get her to sleep for a couple hours, and Sean was trying for an hour before that. Sigh. Apparently babies don’t make enough melatonin to get on a sleep schedule until about 2.5 months.
She keeps teasing me tonight. Several times now she has feigned sleep, only to be wide awake again after a few minutes. About 40 minutes or so ago I decided to swaddle her and shove a pacifier in her mouth just to see if it would help. After that she started looking sleepier, but was still fighting sleep. Now I have her in the bassinet with the swaying motion going… it has taken a while, but I think she might finally be asleep for real… or very close to it at least. Fingers crossed! Although, now it has been a couple hours since she ate last, so this is probably going to be a short nap. Sigh.
One day I will be able to sleep again right? I am just hoping for 6 hours at this point. I think I could live with six hours of sleep. The way it is now, there is no real routine. I am just at the mercy of when Anna gets hungry enough to wake up, which can be anywhere from 2 to 4 hours. And that rare 5 hour stretch we achieved earlier this week. Typically once I get her to sleep at night I do get at least 3 hours though, but sleep sucks being broken into what amounts to a series of naps. I am stuck being awake most of the night, then waking up several times to feed the kiddo (which can take an hour sometimes, or more even, since it also involves getting her back to sleep, diaper changes, and sometimes an outfit change too). This means I don’t usually “get up” until noon or so, at which time it is usually to feed Anna again and start the cycle over again.
So my typical day starts with changing a diaper around noon-1pm, then feeding her and often changing her again, followed by finally getting to eat around 2-3pm, then I get maybe an hour to do things non-baby before she wakes up and wants to eat again. Then the cycle of diapers and feeding starts over again. And of course there could be several diaper changes scattered throughout, she does manage to go through 10 or more a day. If I am lucky I get another hour to do chores or something for myself (like reading or quilting or chores) before Sean gets home. Doing anything else, like going out to lunch or running errands, typically requires sacrificing sleep.
That being said, between the time I can steal here and there, I have been able to work on my lattice quilt. It is nearly done! I just have to finish hand-stitching the binding (fabric covering the raw edge). I ended up doing a larger meandering stitch with black thread. This was my first attempt at free motion quilting, so it sucks as expected. Sean says it isn’t bad, but I think he is just being kind. Given the amount of practice it takes to get good at quilting, I am okay with how crappy it turned out. It has character. I started this quilt as a learning experience, and it definitely has been one. My next quilt will be better for it… although the thought of quilting the next one is even more intimidating now because I want it to turn out good and I know I lack the skills.
Oh, and remember when I said I thought Anna might finally be asleep? Not so much. At this point I am just biding time with a pacifier when she wakes up every few minutes, just waiting a little while longer so I can feed her again.
(and now at 3:20am I think she might really finally be settling in for a nap??)
(and yes it took me over an hour to write this… had to take several breaks to try to get Anna settled, and then to feed her, and a couple diapers were in there too)